“Between the past and the future is the blink of an eye.”
Mikhail Gorbachev
There I was lying in Pensioners’ Pilates at Kents Fitness. I took a look around and saw several of us who once graced the legendary Mal Armstrong’s twice-weekly circuits class, now struggling with a basic hip rotation.
The blink of an eye indeed.
Taking The Piss
Plans to close seven public toilets in outlying areas of the Bradford district put us on a par with the Third World. The fact that several are in areas considered to be tourist attractions further defines this decision as bonkers.
And, if you needed more convincing that the Council have not got a clue, where will thousands of visitors to the area spend a penny when the Tour de Yorkshire comes to town in April 2017?
A showcase event with fully national coverage is in danger of being reduced to an embarrassing farce for spectators.
The cost of running all seven sites is claimed by the Council to be £144k a year; how on Earth can it cost this much to clean toilets? Only the city centre toilets are planned to stay open presumably so the druggies can freshen up.
The elected buffoons that preside over our once great city have been bemoaning austerity for several years now but consider whether we really are all in this together.
Here are the figures for the last three years in respect of the cost of the buffoons:
2014 – £1.79m
2015 – £1.80m
2016 – £1.81m
No sign of any cuts here then so small wonder people suspect the leadership of taking the piss? Even if you believed that it cost what they say it does – do the cleaners go around in Jaguars – an 8% cut in councillors does the job.
Some two hundred miles away in a distant world called London they plan to spend £770m on cycle lanes whilst up in the grim Northerm wastelands people will be shopped for taking relief where they can.
Footnote – with classic timing the asylum convened this week to generously reject a one per-cent rise despite calls to either take a pay-cut or reduce their bloated numbers.
Cllr Hapless asked why councillors should take a cut. “It would be five per cent this year, five per cent next year, and what happens after that? How far do you actually go?”
Well we actually get rid of you dear! Claiming that we would “end up having voluntary councillors” though confirms her supreme delusion that the voters consider this lot as remotely professional.
And They Voted For Her?
If you’ve not listened to this already take three minutes to gauge for yourself more evidence of the barrel-bottom quality of people that can end up sat in Westminster shaping your life.
As an exercise in demolition the interview is pure class and one of the most clinical you will ever hear.
Chasing Gold
Interesting piece on the BBC website as to how UK Sport spend your lottery money in pursuit of Olympic gold. Take a look at the table at the foot of the article to see some interesting choices.
More Taking The Piss – New Prison Block To Open In North Bradford
Cllr Hapless and her merry band are recommending plans to build a new prison on the banks of the Leeds Liverpool canal in a part of Bradford once known for its beauty.
Having approved plans for hundreds of new houses in the last few years, the Council have become disturbed that people have actually disagreed with their North Korean inspired concreting of North Bradford as a settlement for refugees from nearby Leeds.
The Planning Committee met on sight recently to discuss how to quell any demonstrations.
Cllr Hapless said “it’s not my fault…blame Maggie Thatcher…where is Apperley Bridge” before being dragged back to the secure facility.
To Sue No More
George Galloway’s preferred choice of legal bully in the city “…has been shut down following the conviction of its managing partner for defrauding the Legal Aid Agency (LAA) out of nearly £600,000.” Chambers Solicitors has been closed with immediate effect.
In the words of a man lamented by absolutely nobody in Bradford…meow!
Too Hot To Handle?
How strange that it was the Yorkshire Post who broke the story concerning rampant child abuse in Bradford and yet not a whisper from our own paper?
“The new figures, obtained by The Yorkshire Post, show there were 237 crimes linked to CSE against young people in Bradford in the year to March 2016, compared to 131 in Leeds, 108 in Rotherham and 39 in Sheffield. In Kirklees, 66 per cent were historic, compared to just 30 per cent in Bradford, suggesting that the issue in the city is ongoing.
Bradford Council has said in a report it is impossible to tell if it is endemic in the city as there is no benchmark for comparison.”
Did they really say that? How stupid are these people?
As with Rotherham the Council here are simply unfit to control the city and should resign en masse.
If you also needed evidence that the T&A was barely fit to wrap chips in here you have it; almost one week from the story breaking and not a murmur.
Even More Taking The Piss (And The Money) – Hapless Gets A Refurb
Read this and weep as I could not make it up. Small beer it may well be but a massive sign that Hapless has simply not got a clue.
The article states “As this is the first point of contact for many prominent visitors it is desperately in need of a face lift.” They do not make it clear whether this is the building or Hapless.
Pantomime Season
Another morning and another “top-secret” leak to the BBC saying that Brexit will result in foaming waters engulfing the UK and everybody growing three heads.
Sir Ivor Noclue, UK Envoy to Gravy Land, was quoted as saying: “Chaps this is ridiculous that I will lose such a cushy number kissing the arses of the Frogs and the Krauts! Can’t we scare those filthy Northern bastards back down the mines?”
The “impartial” BBC duly repeated the “informed” warning despite nobody having a clue who Sir Noclue was.
One Hundred Years Ago
Uncovered by my old pal Brent, this fascinating website archiving events from another world is food for thought at any time of the year.
I’ll be including this each and every week from now on and hope you find it of interest chronicling events from one hundred years ago.
An Apology…Sort Of
Many of you say very kind things about my weekly efforts here and I do try to raise a smile or two. However, much as I would love to amuse you with endless tales from The Scruffy and observations from my bar stool, outside lies a slightly darker world.
The path my hometown has been on for several years now concerns me deeply. Contending with industrial decline, increasing poverty, social unrest, rising crime and an abject failure of its people by so-called leaders has led us to a cross-roads in my opinion.
Unless we go back to basics – respect for the rule of English law, the abandonment of political correctness plus honest and frank exchanges of opinions – we will simply regress to a very dark place.
Maybe you disagree?
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