DEVOID – “lacking something, especially a good quality”
Living in Bradford you tend to develop a thicker skin than most, especially given the current pitiful image of my birthplace. Last weekend offered some thirty odd thousand inmates a chance to escape to the bright lights for the end of the fairy tale at Wembley, albeit a ruthless savaging by the much superior Swansea City. Come Monday morning, and with the dream over for the faithful it was back to reality. I woke to hear Terry Yorath, the ex-Bradford manager, on Radio Five Live, praising the team’s achievement especially so in the light of the city itself being “devoid of anything”. The national media must love us.
As a forerunner to City’s visit to Wembley last week, BBC Look North produced a half hour piece seeking to determine whether a single football match may offer some longer term hope. The city has been the subject of much media scrutiny in recent years, of late courtesy of the appalling Channel 4 series “Make Bradford British” ( see my take on this ) and race seems an easy angle to further batter the image of a troubled city. However, surely this time with a localised production we could expect something much more informative, balanced and, hopefully, positive?
Alas, this was not to be the case as Paul “The Weatherman” Hudson, born in Keighley and sporting his City scarf, fronted a woeful programme. Predictably and dismally, it began with race relations as its clear underlying theme with a group of young Asian footballers being quizzed as to why they did not all support their home town team. Do all Bradford’s issues come down to the fact that we have a sizeable ethnic minority? Is this why the textile industry vanished, the city centre was brutalised by ugly concrete blocks in the sixties, why we seem to have such an inept Council or why our sexy neighbour – Leeds – shames us daily?
You could have quizzed any group of youngsters – like those from one of the more affluent outlying areas, Eldwick, featured much later – from any background in any city and discovered the same useless information; that courtesy of the pulling power of brands such as Arsenal, Liverpool, Man Utd et al, Bradford is no different. Implying that young Asians, by their preference for the Premier League giants have no connection with the city was lazy and cheap; as was the later focus on the novelty value of a young Asian woman who actually was a fan.
Off we went then to a curry house because, of course, that’s all we have in Bradford forgetting that 65% of the wider Bradford Metropolitan area is rural and is, undeniably, beautiful. The outlying areas may seek to deny that they are part of Bradford but the enormous wealth created in the mills of the city centre spread its tentacles far and wide for generations. Believe it or not there are still major businesses located in Bradford and, no disrespect to the featured restaurateur, perhaps they may have provided some gravitas? The entire programme focused on the drab city centre and that awful hole in the ground ignoring the fact some three miles down the road is a World Heritage site.
The first white collar, middle class viewpoint was from a guy from Sheffield Hallam University, presumably to maintain the theme that none live here, but soon we were back to the race theme with a feature on the young Asian girl simply because she supported City wearing a hijab. The reality is that Bradford has been multi-cultural for over a century, albeit in recent decades, it has been rammed down our throats, enforced rather than simply evolved. Hudson just allowed himself to get sucked in again to tired old themes and lost the chance to present something different whether or not he actually had any editorial input.
Perhaps when you consider our Council is led by a middle aged bloke with an ear-ring you may get an understanding of our plight; perhaps we deserve our music hall joke status; but if only we had somebody like the admirable Emma Heal who was shown ripping into David Cameron, rightly describing the city centre as a “dump”, then we might have hope. There are people who care about the city and are passionate about its future; to deny them access to this programme was a failure.
Of course we face big issues, especially in inner Bradford, with schools coping with the huge challenge of some 140 plus languages currently spoken. All major cities need an educated young workforce to attract inward investment over and above a new Debenhams store as welcome as that will be if it ever rises from the hole.
Finally, it was inevitably over to Leeds, the home of our cocky, confident and flash neighbours – with a new shopping arcade and the impressive Leeds Arena just about to open – for a “branding exercise”. If the featured agency’s clients were watching, perhaps they may have wondered what they are paying for as the “ideas” floated were puerile. A chance to show the city in a positive light was lost so it was left to the magnificent City fans to demonstrate the humour, positivity and resilience you need to live here at the moment.
A Load Of Old Balls
The UK’s credit rating was reduced at the weekend by Moodys, the same credit ratings agency that bundled up junk debt owed by Mexican farmers living in condos in Florida as triple “A”. That we should get our knickers in a twist over such nonsense was determined by how little news was going on. Sadly, it was a quiet weekend with Oscar finally released on bail and a nervous few months for anybody in the Pistorious household seeking a few quiet minutes on the loo.
So we had ashen faced George trying to spin his way out of another fine mess whilst pantomime villain, Dame Fatty Balls, Shadow Minister (Dept of It Wasn’t Us That Screwed It All Up) was back on our screens. Demonstrating that when the great unwashed vote him back to power in a couple of years, presumably on a manifesto of handouts for all, he was blustering again, still insisting that if we cut VAT then life would be tickety-boo for all.
Both sides offer little inspiration and the Coalition continue to try to get away with the con trick that that deficit is being reduced. It’s not and we continue to borrow on the UK credit card to fund a lifestyle we can’t afford anymore. One of the brutal realities of any debt reduction plan is that it takes a long time to make real progress. Of course you can sack librarians, close a few hospital wards but this is always small beer and the savings take time to roll though. Getting big business to pay tax takes even longer. With an election looming on the horizon expect George to start getting his wallet out again maybe by flogging off the odd state owned bank.
Later in the week we had the EU trying to limit banker’s bonuses in the future to the equivalent of one year’s salary prompting howls from Mr Cameron about the likely flight of these pin striped Kings of the Universe, in response to such punitive treatment. How short his memory is as to who actually caused the strife we are in. Where will they flee to…some mountain top in Venezuela? In short they will go nowhere because only in London can they spend the daft sums they earn…more Cameron balls I fear!
The Oddys Wine Bar
Down the hill in Idle the “Oddys” has had a facelift and I am wondering whether we have our first local wine bar, discounting the Symposium which is really a restaurant full of bearded real ale lovers including the women. Each cricket season, the youngsters in the team tempt me down the hill at least once to the Oddys’ “Night scene” where all walks of life congregate till the early hours. Maybe Idle is going upmarket at last…perhaps I shall have to invite the Weatherman?
More Balls
Early contender for Dumb Ad of the Year is the Lucozade one featuring England rugby captain, Chris Robshaw, proclaiming that Lucozade “fuels and hydrates you faster than water”. Well it ought to do something for you given that water is free and the amount of sugar in a bottle of the orange stuff is enough to bake a sponge cake.
Italian Balls
Bunga Bunga is back proving, as many an Italian woman knows – allegedly – that you just cant keep the old man down. Silvio is back promising tax cuts and happy days again proving that you really can have it all in Italy…as long as the Germans keep picking up the tab. As if to prove as well that it’s a mad, mad world a comedian came third – no surprise we’ve got Nick Clegg – and world stock markets tumbled, worrying that Italy wont now pay its debts…as if it ever was.
A Nice Tale
My friend was having dinner in a hotel the other night and got talking to an elderly lady who noticed she was reading my first book – A Critics’ Corner – and detected the cricket theme. This lady had just lost her husband in his late seventies and there was nothing more he liked to do than potter around at the local cricket club. The book was duly donated to this lady and in the morning there was an envelope with £60 for BVCC juniors for “making me see there are other daft buggers about!”
And Finally…Wonky
Have a look at this if you have not seen it; apparently the physios have done a great job getting the little thing back on his feet…we could do with those physios in our dressing room come April.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2284863/Wonky-abandoned-puppy
Rose says
Mr Wilson , loving your weekly ‘thoughts’ . What a fabulous idea ! Look forward to your ‘insights’ as much as my ‘guilty pleasure’ Piers Moron’s Sunday ‘Insider Diaries ‘ – sorry know you will hate the comparison, you being such a fan of Piers !!!!! ……