Musings From The Padded Cell

Archives for October 2014

Baron Smudger, Elvis Costello and The Bogey Man.

The rolling valleys of West Yorkshire used to be lined like giant trees by the mills that built huge fortunes. Most have now fallen by the wayside as we shipped our skills out to the Far East so Primark and Matalan could rule the high street.

I’m Franz Beckenbauer! – Ch1 “Fifty Not Out”

Here is a follow-on to last week’s post about the dire state of grassroots football. Taken from my award winning third book – my mum liked it – this is why my footballing career never rose out of the Sunday morning dog shit.

More Sporting Legacy Bollocks

Way back in 2002 the Labour Government initiated the process of what would ultimately result in the staging of the London Olympics in 2012.

Rising Above The Abyss – The Bradford Odeon

This week I wandered down to the abyss – Bradford city centre – for the first time in a few years. I packed my United Nations phrase book, stuck the sign on my back saying “crap phone, no need to mug” and set off to Cllr Ear Ring’s Utopia.


We Brits love a good wedding. It’s a chance for otherwise sane and respectable people to act like lunatics for a day and your aunt to convince herself that she really could make the Strictly finals with a bit more disco in her.

Gone Fishing!

I’ve been away this week but did not want to let down those of you who actually look forward to my weekly offering; so I’ve done a Phil & Kirsty and “revisited” an old piece. At my age old pieces are the only things left to revisit.